Tech Support – the HP Way

Reading this gem (hat tip: Ben Casnocha) about the nightmare of trying to get HP support their PC’s reminded me of my own horror story. Actually, not horror – just comedy.

Anyway… yeah, I was weak, fell for the good deal at Costco, and got myself a Vista-loaded junk from HP. There’s one component that shines – literally: the display. 22 inches of shiny black beauty, sharp screen, it tilts and moves around in every imaginable way, even pivots for a vertical view. But there was a little glitch with pivoting: I had to lie down to read the screen. There was no way to get the screen image rotate – something that should happen automatically.

I’ll spare you the first 20 minutes or so of the online chat with HP support, let’ s just jump to where it got really interesting:

Support: You probably have a video card that does not support auto-pivoting.

Me: That’s not possible. I did not build this machine, it’s a standard HP system out-of-the-box.

Support: I don’t understand.

Stop. Take a deep breath. This is just hilarious. Rather than trying to find the answer, the easy way out is to claim a standard configuration HP is selling consists of a mismatched video card and monitor.smile_angry She has absolutely no idea how she is damaging the brand. Oh, well, let’s get a supervisor … wait .. disconnect.

Btw, “disconnecting” appears to be a standard HP solution to support issues: I’m still waiting for this other fellow to “gather all information” to my email over a month ago. Perhaps he’ll figure it out by the time I dump this PC. smile_sad


  1. May be you should add to the list of questions for Mark Hurd

  2. I sent copies of this everywhere maybe I will be successful .. I know I can do it myself but my system is less than 2 weeks old why ruin the warranty?….

    Hewlett Packard Fails this is their mission and values,,,,, after spending all day on the phone with them KNOWING they have the capability to downgrade my business system to windows XP from Vista

    “It is necessary that people work together in unison toward common objectives and avoid working at cross purposes at all levels if the ultimate in efficiency and achievement is to be obtained.”

    — Dave Packard = FAIL Mr. Packard had it going on then but wonder what happened?

    Our Shared Values = FAIL

    Passion for customers

    We put our customers first in everything we do= Definite FAIL

    Trust and respect for individuals

    We work together to create a culture of inclusion built on trust, respect and dignity for all. =

    FAIL It’s my machine I paid for it! I should have what I want in it!

    Achievement and contribution

    We strive for excellence in all we do; each person’s contribution is critical to our success =

    FAIL as a customer I was treated like a thief! By Mr. X won’t name him publicly but will be pleased to talk to HP about him …UNLIKE HP I have scruples

    Results through teamwork

    We effectively collaborate, always looking for more efficient ways to serve our customers. =

    FAIL phone support is awful

    Results through teamwork

    We are resourceful and adaptable, and we achieve results faster than our competitors. =

    FAIL really try your own phone support some day

    Meaningful innovation

    We are the technology company that invents the useful and the significant. =

    FAIL Vista is only useful to those who like eye candy! Its bloat ware! Shame on HP for supporting taking your audience captive

    Uncompromising integrity

    We are open, honest and direct in our dealings. =Pass your right your company was downright direct in calling me a thief! If you ask me you’re holding my system hostage

    Customer loyalty = FAIL I have 3 HP machines I run, DUDE I’m getting a Dell even they are better at this point

    We earn customer respect and loyalty by consistently providing the highest quality and value. =FAIL just try to get a compromise


    We achieve sufficient profit to finance growth, create value for our shareholders and achieve our corporate objectives. = PASS I’ll give you that take the money and RUN HP RUN


    We recognize and seize opportunities for growth that builds upon our strengths and competencies.=Uncertain looks like your in deep with Microsoft shoving an OS down the public’s throat!

    Market leadership

    We lead in the marketplace by developing and delivering useful and innovative products, services and solutions.=FAIL Vista is only useful to a hand full of people Just look at the internet and how everyone is scrambling to get it off their computer

    Commitment to employees

    We demonstrate our commitment to employees by promoting and rewarding based on performance and by creating a work environment that reflects our values.=PASS yup they act just like a bunch of MS rats

    Leadership capability

    We develop leaders at all levels who achieve business results, exemplify our values and lead us to grow and win.=FAIL Mr. X is a leader? with leaders like him who needs assassin? Character Assassins that is

    Global citizenship

    We fulfill our responsibility to society by being an economic, intellectual and social asset to each country and community where we do business. =FAIL Intellect means the capacity for rational or intelligent thought especially when highly developed.

    I will blog post and mail this where ever I can and tell my story


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