The best CRM system can’t help you if your sales / marketing team is clueless.  Here’s a ridiculous email I’ve just received.  Name removed to protect the (not-so) innocent

X. Y. kindly requests a meeting

Hi Zoli,

In celebrating our 40th anniversary, I’ve been given the privilege to manage the relationship between your organization and Communispond. When you have a moment, please take a look at the information below. Kindly let me know if it’s out of date, and the best way to reach you. I wish to be respectful of your time and patience.

Is your organization prepared with the communication tools and behaviors (presenting, selling, coaching, persuading, etc) to achieve greater success in 2010? I would like to hear your thoughts and ideas on any communication challenges you anticipate, and see if we can help. Please let me know if you’d be willing to meet with me – either conference call or face to face. l greatly appreciate your consideration.

Warm Regards,
X. Y.

What’s wrong with this email campaign?  A few things… where should I even start?

Obsolete data: we all know this is a disease that plagues many (CRM) systems, but this one is extreme.  The data shown on this business card never existed in such combination, but bits and pieces did.  Yes, I participated in SAP’s International Consultant Training – 20 years ago, in Vienna, Austria (that’s in Europe, just in case…), so they must have picked it up from a very-very ancient resume. (It also means I understand Charlie’s joke…).  Yes, I did work at SAP America, when they were a tiny outfit with 70+ employees, and the Newton Square HQ listed above was not even a dream.

Data errors do happen – but how on Earth could they dump 20-year old, pre-CRM, pre-ERP, pre-everything data into a CRM system?

Now let’s focus on content.  The title, specifically.  That’s the marketer’s opportunity to grab attention – or lose it.  Time is money, and most of us don’t have a lot to waste – why on Earth would I want to meet a stranger without any previous contact or knowing the intent?

You just don’t send out an initial contact request asking for a purpose-less meeting.

Anyway – this email is in its well-deserved place in my Spam folder and Communispond is flagged as mindless marketers. But hey, it was good for a rant.  In return, free advice to them: you don’t need Salesforce.com.  It won’t help you.

Update:  This post originally appeared almost a year ago .   The reason I am republishing it is that so did they.  They just resent the same dumb junk mail, verbatim, without the slightest change, despite my previous post and response to them.  How dumb is that?  Oh one more thing: through how many years can they be celebrating their 40th anniversary?  (hint: it was indeed last year).

(Cross-posted @ CloudAve)