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Citibank, Get a Clue!

 Email @ 9:20pm yesterday:

Your Citibank statement is now available at http://www.citicards.com. This notification is part of the All-Electronic Program you enrolled in to receive your statements online only instead of in the mail

Email @ 10:07pm yesteday:

Live the clutter-free life by replacing your regular printed statement with an electronic one.
It’s easy to enroll! Simply sign on to citibankonline.com

This from the Citi that “Never Sleeps”smile_eyeroll

Update: While at it… Dear Citi, could you please take the monthly junk-mail (typically inviting me to credit cards I already have from you)  that comes to my house in multiple thick envelopes  and shove it.. no, you won’t, but at least send it electronically, so I can quickly and painlessly route it to the junk folder.  If you do that, you can launch a new marketing campaign… you know, about being Green.smile_wink

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Have Some Class, PR People!

Yet another PR email about a startup launch at Demo – that’s OK, some are actually interesting.  The email itself was a fairly standard one, what ticked me off was the signature block:

Jane Doe
Public Relations Consultant
myname@yahoo.com

www.customcardsbyme.com

Ebay UserID: idunno

Obviously I changed the specifics, to protect her privacy.  And on second thought, I am not the one hurt here – the startup is.

Please, please, when you spend megabucks to attend Demo, could you not find a real PR rep?  (If you can’t, I’m sure my friend Brian Solis will help you).  And for you, so-called PR Consultants: please, have some class!  You have to decide if you’re promoting your Client or your eBay deals.  You can’t do both.

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Naked Buddies @ FastCompany

Naked Conversations co-authors Robert Scoble and Shel Israel are finally co-working again, as video-bloggers @ FastCompany TV. Shel’s show will be GlobalNeighbourhoods TV (GNTV), while Robert’s is – what else? – Scoble TV.

Congrat’s and have fun! (naked or clothedsmile_wink).

P.S. On second thought, if they plan to do a lot of Naked business together, they might invite the CEO if Zivity.smile_tongue

Update (1/30):  Robert posted the same pic explaining that they were NOT naked.  Of course not!  I remember, as I was there, at the 5th TechCrunch party, which became the Naked Conversations launch party.  So it’s a promo shot at a promo party – and hey, there is strong symbolism in the title, the co-authors did not get undressed just for fun (or who knows?beer). They are the Naked Buddies – as in co-authors of Naked Conversations. 

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Is Going Green Good Marketing?

I’ve received an email from European SaaS All-in-One SMB provider 24SevenOffice (wow, that’s a mouthful, basically NetSuite+Office for really small businesses, see my earlier coverage):

2008 must be the year when we all act against the serious environmental threat that the world is facing. 24SevenOffice has developed “The Go Green Game”, a Flash-game that puts focus on the pollution caused by the millions of unnecessary server rooms and servers located in all companies.

In addition, 24SevenOffice will plant trees based on the number of players, in co-operation with Nobel Peace Prize winner Maathai’s Green Belt Movement. If you wish to make a direct contribution to the society, let yourself entertain at http://game.24SevenOffice.com/ or forward this e-mail to friends, colleagues and business partners who are committed to the environmental battle.

Thank you for showing responsibility for the environment! The game can be found here: http://game.24SevenOffice.com/

I had mixed thoughts at first reading: Obviously environmental consciousness is becoming fashionable. Companies rush to launch their green initiatives in order to look “responsible corporate citizens”. OK, that’s the cynical view, but after all, these are often useful initiatives, and I’ve already said you don’t have to be purely altruistic to do good.

Whatever this game may be, it’s just a “save the earth” message, it’s not a vehicle to push 24SevenOffice products…

But wait! Like Columbo, when you think he’s gone, but comes back and drops the gist of the conversation, there’s a footnote here:

NB! The products mentioned in this e-mail are not the environmental sinners in themselves.
The environmental problem is based on the fact that most businesses, unnecessarily, have their own
servers and server rooms. This is the issue that 24SevenOffice is addressing.

Ahh…so it is advertising after all. Oh, well, it still delivers a correct message .. let’s check out the game itself:

I need to practice my swing, I could barely smash a few servers, look how much they’ve already racked up! Even worse, I’m not good in reading instructions, totally missed option#2, which is…no, I can’t tell you, it’s too violent.smile_devil

Joke apart, 24SevenOffice clearly has a point: maintaining millions of servers for (small) businesses is wasteful, switching to Cloud Computing allows central servers to be more efficiently utilized, we’re all saving energy.

As a side-note, I’ve just looked at a web-based service that allows us, as individual consumers “go green” – will report about it when they are ready.

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Dream Job for a Software Marketing VP @ Atlassian

Atlassian, a fast-growing, successful enterprise software company is looking for a VP of Marketing. I don’t normally broadcast job searches here, but am breaking that rule now for I believe this is a truly exceptional opportunity with a truly exceptional company. (Disclaimer: I have no business affiliation with Atlassian, but admit to being positively biased, as the company exemplifies a lot that I stand for.)

They are best known for two products: Jira, the issue tracking & software project management application was their first hit, putting the company on the fast growth track and establishing a loyal fan-base in the IT community.  Their existing reputation in the IT community certainly helped the second product, Confluence, the enterprise wiki gain traction: it is now equally popular in the IT and business community.  Wikis in general  have become more commonly known in the past two years; once a tiny market niche, today a growing field where new entrants pop up left and right, claiming to be best in this and that….  But numbers talk, and the verdict is clear: Confluence is the undisputed enterprise wiki market leader. 
Atlassian is not sitting on their laurels: in the past year they diversified, acquiring several companies and launching new products on their own.  Frankly, I lost track, but I believe  their portfolio currently includes 8 products, all part of an “IT toolkit”, with the exception of Confluence, which is seeing fast adoption amongst business users, too.  

The customer list is impressive: IBM, HP, SAP, Citigroup, Boeing, BMW, Shell, McDonalds, Pfizer … just about all the Fortune 1000, as well as non-profits, Universities, Government Agencies, totaling over 9000 customers worldwide. (The chart is a bit misleading: Atlassian’s fiscal year starts in June, and the FY08 bar shows the current figure only, excluding projections.)

How did they achieve this?  They must have an excellent sales force.  Wrong! Atlassian has no sales force at all.  They don’t sell: customers simply buy their products on their own.   I often talk about  the pull-model that’s replacing the traditional, expensive enterprise sales process (6-9 months, high touch, flights, meetings, wine-and-dining, entertaining, in the end often nuked by politicssmile_baringteeth) – but that’s typically in the context of Software as a Service, and in the SMB (small business) market.  Atlassian’s products are mostly on-premise (although they now have a hosted version of Confluence) and their primary market is the large Enterprise.  Yet they pulled off what amounts to a small miracle:  essentially took the download.com, tucows style model we all know as consumers, and ported it to the enterprise space. 

Of course having customers try-and-buy through the Internet is not as simple as firing your Sales team ( or not hiring one).  It’s not a matter of a decision: it’ s a consistently applied philosophy, that you have to implement in every aspect of your business.  The key components are:

  • lightweight software
    • well-defined function set, meets specific user need, small user groups can get started
    • ease of use (both easy to learn and easy to use)
    • well documented, well supported
  • transparency
    • features (what you’re getting, no surprises)
    • issues (Atlassian’s bug tracker is open to the public)
    • pricing (simple, upfront pricing, no fill-out-contact-form-wait-for-sales-to-call-back BS)
  • low price (“expensable, not approvable” – to quote a former competitor)

The “pull-model” means customers will need to find you- which is why Marketing is a critical function.  With Sales gone, Marketing becomes sales (actually, Atlassian’s CEO proudly says everyone is in Sales, especially Support).  So if you are a marketing superstar,  or know one, want to be part of a successful team, work for celebrities , you owe it to yourself to apply.

Atlassian is not only about business – it’s about people.  I know, old cliche.. but here it works.  The unique culture this team maintained throughout their super-growth even now that they have 130 people is a large part of their success.

So what is this culture like?  Tough. When he doesn’t make his numbers, Atlassian President Jeffrey Walker is forced to make up for it as ticket-scalper on the street. smile_omg OK, joke apart, this photo was shot last August, when the entire San Francisco office went to see a Giants game together. (Incidentally, just a day before Jeffrey became cancer dude). This wasn’t a rare occasion, either: both the San Francisco and the Sydney teams have a lot of fun together:  Cutlassian, Mission: Atlassian, theme-filled staff events, abound throughout the year.   Their new office  building in Sydney is right next to a pub (hint: when will you guys realize you’d be better off buying the entire pub?beer)  I wonder when the San Francisco office will move into a winery…  Perhaps you get the picture by now: Working for Atlassian isn’t just a job  – it’s a lifestyle.  But don’t for a minute think it’s a bunch of rowdy kids having fun only:  they bring in $30 million a year.  And if you don’t perform, this is what awaits you.

So that’s the magic formula: combine business success with a fun, team-focused culture and you’ve got the makings of the ultimate job.  (Are you still reading, or have you alerted your Marketing superstar friend yet?)

Now, if this is the ultimate job, there’s one question unanswered: How come it hasn’t been filled yet?  I wanted to hear the answer straight from the horse’s mouse so to speak, so I asked Atlassian President Jeffrey Walker, who responded below:

We were inundated with resumes, and found a few excellent capable candidates. Unfortunately, one of the growing pains of companies like ours is we were not quite ready for the right candidate. Incorporating someone of the caliber we need takes preparation. Our search began prematurely. Lesson learned. After the founders and I took another few ‘long walks’, we came out aligned and ready. This time I fully expect to complete the search. Just need the right remarkable individual.

Well, I did not walk with Jeffrey and the Founders, but I certainly hope they will not change a lot:smile_wink.  I have a lot to say on the subject of hiring, but it’s not specific to Atlassian, so I’ll break it out to a separate post.  In the meantime, if you are that “remarkable individual”, what are you waiting for?

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Gizmodo Calling Themselves Names

I really did not want to write about Gizmodogate again.  But instead of letting it die, today Gizmodo found it important to defend themselves as saviors of journalistic independence:

Our prank pays homage to the notion of independence and independent reporting. And no matter how much access the companies give us, we won’t ever stop being irreverent. That’s what this prank was about and what the press should understand.

How heroic!  And hypocritical, as I pointed out before.  After all, it was Mighty Hero Gizmodo themselves who not only trashed the TV-B-Gone 3 years ago:

Mitch Altman is an asshole. And not just any asshole, but one of those snotty holier-than-thou types who has nothing better to do with the money he made as a founder of 3ware than to develop a device with the sole purpose of imposing his viewpoint on others…
…Essentially a universal remote that cycles through every possible code, the TV-B-Gone has a single purpose: to power off televisions whenever the user feels like being a dick.

(Emphasis mine). So who is the dick now?

Related posts: Scobleizer, mathewingram.com/work, kottke.org, IP Telephony, VoIP, Broadband, Venture Chronicles and The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs, Webware.com

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Too Bad Gizmodo / Gawker Media is Not Public

(Updated)
This would be a good time to short their stock.  The biggies hurt at CES would sue their a***s off.  The video is really fun to watch.  Except if you’re one of the people who worked hard to prepare, stage and deliver their presentation which the pranksters  sc***ed with – let alone the companies that spent millions to participate at the show.

 

Not everyone agrees, and frankly, I am amazed how people I normally respect find it a laughing matter.

Update (1/12): Must be a slow weekend, this is still the hot topic on TechMemeWebware, Hardware 2.0, TECH.BLORGE.com, Valleywag, bub.blicio.us, Crave, Geek News Central, The Stalwart, Laughing Squid, Silicon Alley Insider, Bloggers Blog, Scobleizer… you name it.  They all (including me) missed this irony:  Gizmodo themselves trashed the TV-B-Gone 3 years ago:

Mitch Altman is an asshole. And not just any asshole, but one of those snotty holier-than-thou types who has nothing better to do with the money he made as a founder of 3ware than to develop a device with the sole purpose of imposing his viewpoint on others…
…Essentially a universal remote that cycles through every possible code, the TV-B-Gone has a single purpose: to power off televisions whenever the user feels like being a dick.

So who is the a**hole now?  And who feels like being a d*ck?   Was this Altman’s ultimate revenge?  smile_baringteeth
(hat tip: Anonymous commenter)

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The Nothing New Announcement

Ever get the feeling that some tech firms have run out of anything new to say?  So does fellow Enterprise Irregular Brian Sommer, so he offers a template for such companies:

XYZ Announces Nothing New

Nothing New to Become the New Industry Standard  

January 9, 2008 – Chicago – Today, XYZ Corporation is announcing ‘Nothing New’ a revolutionary, industry-leading approach to stall-ware, procrastination and marketing waste. “We believe this is the most important announcement we’ve made this year – maybe this decade”, says Jim Bigwind, CMO of XYZ. 

“This announcement is nothing short of extraordinary. It is, in fact, nothing” says XYZ customer Getz Fleeced Oftin at SoftTouch Ltd.

Blithering Media represents way too many tech firms and amazingly enough has no one on staff that understands the space. Blithering Media personnel are expert though at crafting press releases on just about anything (or nothing as in this case). For more info on Blithering Media contact us point.less@ blitheringmedia.com

I’m not giving away the full announcement – click over to Software Safari and enjoy. smile_tongue

Update (1/11): Wow, Brian is on fire: his next piece, Acronym Shortage to Adversely Impact Tech Sector is a must-read. smile_teeth

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Bite the Hand that Feeds You?

There’s a new online Office player in town: Sabeer Bhatia, co-founder of Hotmail, the web-mail service that perfected viral marketing and got acquired by Microsoft for $400 million, unveiled his free web-office suite yesterday. It does not look at Google, Zoho or ThinkFree, it aims at Microsoft directly:

“We are just a few years away from the end of the shrink-wrapped software business. By 2010, people will not be buying software,” Mr Bhatia said. “This is a significant challenge to a proportion of Microsoft’s revenues.”

So be it – I am a certified web-app fanboy. I’m still waiting for my trial account (and wonder if I will ever get it after this post) , so I can’t comment on the applications themselves, but I think Mr. Bhatia’s choice of a name is rather tasteless: Live Documents. What’s wrong with that? Nothing.. except the close resemblance to Microsoft’s Windows Live brand. I only have “conspiracy theories” here:

  • Live Documents is a shameless rip-off of the MS brand, Mr. Bhatia is literally biting the hand that fed him and indirectly funded this company.
  • He is riding on Microsoft’s coat-tails: his application is (supposedly) very similar to MS Office 2007, he offers a plug-in to the MS products, uses the MS Office logo quite liberally throughout his site, people know his background with MS – all this creates the impression that his products is somehow jointly developed with Microsoft. (?) While this may help gaining traction initially, I think confusing customers is a very-very bad policy. (But what do I know, I haven’s sold a business for $400Msmile_embaressed)
  • Finally, the most far-fetched speculation: this is indeed Microsoft’s secret weapon, named appropriately so it fits easily after it’s absorbed in a $billion+ deal.

I can’t wait to hear from Microsoft… Don? Cliff? Chris? Anyone?

Update (11/23): Dan Farber on ZDNEt came to the same conclusions – literally.

Update #2: As much as I don’t like the Live copycat, I have to admit calling it “service plus software” is a smart play on Microsoft’s “software plus service“, indicating the shift in priorities. smile_wink

Related stories: Times Online, Techspot, Macworld UK, PC Advisor, Digital Inspiration, Between the Lines, /Message, Rough Type , deal architect, Zoho Blogs, TECH.BLORGE.com, Read/WriteWeb, TechCrunch, Betaflow.

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The Irony of Contextual Advertising

I fully agree with Ionut: Gmail’s spam filtering is amazingly effective. I don’t really care about how they do it, as long as it works this well.thumbs_up

But there’s a bit of irony in his post on Google Operating System, and it comes from none other than Google: just as soon as he’s done praising Gmail, Adsense serves up ad ad from a competing service: onlymyemail.com.

Funny thing is, competitor or not, Adsense is correct: the ad is as contextual as it can get, since the article was about spam filtering.smile_tongue

Of course it could have been a lot worse

(P.S. the pic is only for illustration of what I found on Ionut’s blog; I am not running ads here)

Update: Donna Bogatin found another Web Blooper.